Anniversary Wishes for a Partner, Parents and Friends, Year by Year

A good anniversary wish says how many years it has been and holds one thing from those years that only this couple has: the flat with the broken heater, the song from the first dance, the year they nearly moved abroad. For your own partner, write as one of the two people who lived it. For your parents, friends or a sibling, write as someone who watched it happen.

Below are examples for both, wishes by milestone from the first year to the golden, short lines for a card and one longer letter. The generator on this page works from the same material: type who the anniversary is for, how many years it is and one memory, and it writes the wish.

Writing to your own husband, wife or partner

Your partner knows how you talk. A wish full of words you never use, "soulmate" or "my everything", will sound borrowed even when you mean it. Write it the way you would say it at dinner, and put in something only the two of you would recognise: a place, a habit, a line from a film, the year that was hard.

• "Seven years, two flats, one terrible sofa and a lot of Sunday pancakes. I'd do every one of them again with you. Happy anniversary."
• "Happy anniversary to the only person who laughs at my jokes the second time. Here's to year twelve, and to finally painting the hallway."
• "Twenty years ago you missed the last bus and walked me home instead. You're still walking me home. Happy anniversary."
• "This year was hard, and you didn't let go of my hand once. Happy anniversary, love. Next year is ours."
• "Happy anniversary. Nine years, and you still haven't worked out that I'm the one who eats the last biscuit."

A private joke is allowed here, and it is often the best line. Only the two of you have to understand it.

Anniversary wishes for parents, friends and family

When the anniversary belongs to someone else, you write as a witness. Couples rarely hear what their marriage looks like from the outside, so tell them one thing you have seen: how they argue, how they host, how one of them still waits up.

For your parents

• "Mum and Dad, thirty-five years. You taught us that marriage is mostly who makes the tea and who warms up the car, and that both jobs matter. Happy anniversary from all four of us."
• "Happy anniversary to the two people who still hold hands in the supermarket. We're embarrassed and very proud."
• "Dear Mum and Dad, thank you for showing us what it looks like when two people keep choosing each other, even in the years with no money and three teenagers. Happy anniversary."

When one of them has died

The date does not disappear when a husband or wife dies, and a short message on the day often means a great deal. Say you are thinking of them both and add a memory if you have one. Do not ask for cheerfulness.

• "Mum, I know today would have been your anniversary with Dad. I'm thinking of you both, and of how he always bought you tulips a week early because he couldn't wait. I'll call you tonight."

For friends, a brother or sister, the neighbours

• "Happy anniversary, Tom and Jess! Five years since the wedding where it rained on everyone except the two of you. Dinner's on us this weekend."
• "Happy tenth, big sister. You and Mark make it look easy, and we all know it isn't. Proud of you both."
• "Happy anniversary to our favourite neighbours. Thirty years on the same street, and you still wave to each other across the garden."

Anniversary names and wishes by milestone

English has a traditional name for most anniversaries. The lists differ a little between the UK and the US, but the big ones are the same everywhere: silver at 25 years, golden at 50, diamond at 60. Putting the name in the card shows you know exactly how far they have come.

Other languages count differently. Russian gives almost every year its own name, starting with a "chintz" wedding after the first year; Hebrew speakers mostly say the number and keep names for silver and golden; Arabic uses اليوبيل الفضي and اليوبيل الذهبي for the 25th and the 50th. The Russian, Hebrew and Arabic versions of this page have their own lists.

The first anniversary

• "One year married, and I still like saying 'my wife' a little too much. Happy first anniversary, Hannah."
• "Happy first anniversary, you two! The thank-you cards are finally sent. Here's to a second year with less planning and more lazy Sundays."

Ten years

• "Ten years, two kids, one dog and the same argument about the thermostat. Happy tenth, you two. You make it look like fun."

25 years, the silver anniversary

• "Happy silver anniversary, Mum and Dad. Twenty-five years, three moves and all of us, and you still save each other the crispy bits of the roast."
• "Twenty-five years! We were at the wedding and we still remember the band. Happy silver anniversary to the couple who taught us how to throw a party."

40 years, the ruby anniversary

• "Forty years ago you danced to a song neither of you can name now. We're glad you remembered everything else. Happy ruby anniversary."

50 years, the golden anniversary

• "Grandma and Grandpa, fifty years. Everything our family has, the Sunday lunches, the jokes, even the stubbornness, started with the two of you. Happy golden anniversary."
• "Happy golden anniversary. Half a century on, and Grandpa still calls Grandma 'the boss' and means every word."

A line for the card, or a whole letter?

For a card, a text or the tag on a gift, one to three sentences is right. These work for your own partner almost as they stand:

• "Happy anniversary to my favourite person to do nothing with."
• "Another year of choosing each other. Happy anniversary."
• "Twelve years, and you're still my first call. Happy anniversary."

A big year, the tenth or the twenty-fifth, can take a letter. A shape that works: open with one scene from the wedding or the early years, say what has happened since in a few plain facts, then say what you want for the year ahead. Stop before it turns into a speech.

"

Dear Sam, twenty years ago today it rained so hard that the photographer gave up and we took the pictures in the car park. I thought that was the story of our wedding. It turned out to be the story of us: something goes wrong, and you make it funny. Since then we have lived in four flats, raised Lily and learned to cook your dad's soup without him. You have been patient with my job, my mother and my driving, in roughly that order. What I want for the next year is simple: Sunday walks without phones, the trip to Lisbon we keep promising ourselves, and you, exactly as you are, a bit greyer. Happy anniversary. I would marry you in that car park again. Anna

Phrases to swap for something only they have

Anniversary cards repeat the same handful of lines, and each one has an easy replacement.

• Instead of "Here's to many more", name the next one: "Here's to year eleven, and to that trip to Lisbon."
• Instead of "You are an inspiration to us all", say what they showed you: "You proved two people can disagree about everything and still make each other laugh."
• Instead of "love, laughter and happiness", pick one wish and make it small: "more quiet evenings on the balcony".
• Instead of "Happy 25th!" on its own, add what the years looked like: "Twenty-five years since you said yes under that tent in the rain."
• Instead of "soulmate" or "my everything", if you never say those words out loud, use the name you really call them.

Letting the generator on this page write it

Type who the anniversary is for, how many years it is and one memory into the box above, for example "our parents' 40th, they met at a dance in 1985 and Dad still can't dance". The agent asks what they are like and which tone you want, then writes the wish. Ask for a card line or a whole letter, warmer or funnier, or the same text in Russian for a grandmother who reads it more easily. Text greetings are free.

The agent keeps your people, with names, dates and notes, so next year it does not ask again. Add the anniversary to the couple and a reminder arrives a week before, with a greeting ready to finish.

For a big year, an old wedding photo can become part of the greeting. A card with the couple in it or a few seconds of video costs credits, and the price is on the button before you press it. We made the clip below with Wan 3.0: an older couple on a park bench, five seconds with sound. Our guide on bringing a family photo to life explains which photos animate well, and a song with their story in it is another way to mark a golden year.

If the couple is newly married, our page of wedding wishes has lines for the day itself.